I Wish...

You are struck in a traffic jam. Honking doesn’t help. Tempers flaring high. Frustration building inside. It is just you and your vehicle and the stupid old Red Light!!!

I still vividly remember the day while I was coming back from an outing with one of my close friends. It was one of those burning hot May Day when the Sun was shining way too brightly on top of us. We had decided to go out simply because it was DAY of freedom- Exams had finished and we had nothing better to do so we decided to strike it out. After traveling the whole of Delhi, that day, it was 6 in the evening when we started back to our respective places of safe haven. I boarded an auto thinking I would reach home swiftly in another 30 minutes but alas, I completely forgot about the horrendous Delhi jam. And during the office hours it is at its height. My autowallah turned off his gurgling vehicle and waited impatiently for the huge cars to start moving ahead. I was busy fixing my antique MP3 player when I heard a tap-tap sound. I looked around but could not figure out what it was or where that soft sound came from. Concentrating back on my mechanistic skills, I began fiddling with my MP3 yet again and there came a bang-bang sound. I again looked up curiously and to my surprise I found a little baby in a swanky Honda City playing with the window pane and banging hard on the glass. Its Pay-Attention-To-Me attitude impressed me so much so that I began staring at him intently. Like an interested spectator, I witnessed his juggling skills and tumbling over and what not. His naïve smile with fingers rolled up on his eyes, made me wonder… "Waooh... you are so lucky kid!!! You don't have to face the hurdles of life! You have a long way to go! And you can afford to enjoy, kick and smile! I envy you! Wish I was a kid again…. Wish I could get back my childhood yet again… Wish I could have those carefree days again in my life…. I spent the next 15 minutes watching his extra-ordinary kiddish antiques.

Suddenly the Honda City swooshed past me and the age-old Auto roared back to life. I realized the jam was clearing out. The child was gone and so was my smile. It was back to the grind. Tension loomed large. “I hope I reach safely back home. It was already past 7. Notorious Delhi and its traffic… Phew!!! “, my mind grumbled. This is ADULT LIFE.


Any takers???

WHEN MY HEART SAID,"I DO"!!!

“THE TIME HAS COME”, uttered my mind suddenly yesterday as I was busy cramming the facts of Plato and Aristotle for my upcoming final examination. This impulsive statement alarmed my heart and it woke up with a start. “Yeah, the time has come…but for what?” asked my heart in a semi-interested and laid-back tone with a tinge of casualness. It sounded a little sarcastic but to be frank, my heart’s flippant attitude cannot be blamed. After all, my mind is infamous for issuing epiphany-oriented statements on a lot of occasions earlier. “The time to indulge in some serious thinking”, elucidated my mind with sheer seriousness.

My heart uncovered the veil of ignorance from its face by widening its eyes to the maximum limit. Affairs of the heart (with its own niceties) are slightly different as compared to the matters of the mind. My heart appeared a little aware about the time-related conversation initiated by my brainy mind. “I see…but wait a second… thinking about what exactly?” questioned my heart sitting upright in a Thinking Man pose (Read: My heart is frivolous and crazy with a funny bone… Yes! My heart possesses a bone… I know it’s a tricky fact for the biologists to digest) Choosing his words carefully my mind answered, “Thinking about LIFE… the most underestimated and underrated statement ever uttered by mankind”.

The answer did not convince my heart and it was brimming with queries. Its thirst for knowledge is unbearable and sometimes even I start wondering- Is it really my heart or has God transplanted some other Homo Sapiens’s heart in me by mistake? “And why this sudden inclination to think about Life?” asked my curious heart. My mind could sense that this question was on its way and the moment it was delivered my mind simply blurted out, “Because I am frustrated… frustrated with a capital F. It is high time I let some steam off my chest. I want to vent out all the pent-up frustration. They are pouncing to dash out any moment now. I really can’t take it anymore. I feel like tearing my hair apart or smashing someone’s brain out. There seems to be no way out… no way out for relief… no way out for any sort of happiness… and where dark, gloomy days reign in full blow. Even crying does not lighten my burden of woes. I hate this. Haven’t you ever faced such things? Don’t you ever feel like running away from this wretched life??? ”.

My heart was speechless. Silence prevailed. No one said anything. (Read: No one implies my heart and it dared not crack any silly joke at this point as it’s always used to). My heart did not anticipate such an impulsive eruption of emotions. Even I was taken aback by this sudden outburst of my own mind. Whoa! That was heavy! Tired, worn-out and busted to the core… Everything had fallen apart and torn to pieces… The last straw of hope seems to have been dashed to the ground… the ray of the light through the rear crooked view did not materialize as expected… My mind was facing a sudden blackout and my heart went out for it.

Finally my heart gathered all the courage in the world. Shaking its head silently, it muttered slowly, “Yes, I DO… I do understand there are times in life when you feel totally down and dejected… When you feel like the biggest LOSER on the entire planet … When you just wish to shut yourself up from the outside world… Disappointment looms large… But that does not mean you give up living. You might be totally down but not out. Frustration is not the end of the world. You have to understand that human life is full of miseries and obstacles. We ought to take these hurdles in our stride, accept the challenge and work towards securing a brighter future. Where there is a WILL there is certainly a WAY out. So keep that WILL of yours flying high in the sky. Don’t let it collapse so easily. Don’t give up”.

My heart won over my mind. I shut my book, switched off the lights and closed my eyes. I couldn’t wait for the next day’s morning sun to shine brightly on me. After all I had to find the WAY out to fulfill my WILL. I will never GIVE UP on my life so easily.

HAIL THE HEART!!!

Does It Exist???

I am alone, down but not out of this world. Every night I lie down on my bed, cry a little and then close my eyes and pray to God. Feeling the frustration inside sometimes I feel that I am the biggest loser on this earth. At times, I wish I could just fly away from this tray of sorrows, to a place where only peace and happiness resides. No pain… no grief… no heartache to encounter… solace to the aggrieved mind and heart. I need a place where I don’t have to face the vagaries of a heavy human life and can carry on living with untold boundaries. I yearn for a place where every faltering step does not lead to sadness. Does such a place exist? Does such a place exist on this planet?

I never complained to God for my wretched life. I never blamed God for giving me unending miseries because humans are bound to face rejections, unhappiness and despondency at one or the other point in their life. It is an unstated statement… It is a universal truth which we all learn in the nascent years of our life. From time immemorial, human beings have understood this ugly fact and learnt to live with it. But sometimes it simply becomes too much to handle and you dream of transporting yourself to such a place where you don’t have to worry or cry or scream out of frustration. I really need that place… My heart questions, “But does such places exist here? If yes, then where? And how to find it!!!”. Silence prevails… I don’t have any answers…

Do you have any???